ALBUMS

          Rock and stroll 

Rock 'n' Roll forgot 

An empty room 
   An empty chair 
      But I'm the one 
         Who's sitting there 
            just sitting there 
See my reflection 
   On the wall 
      But there's no mirror 
         There's just nothing at all 
            no, oh 
Not a sound 
   Not a word 
      'cause I'm the one 
         who'll never be heard 
            no, never be heard, yeah 

Chorus : 

'cause I'm, I'm the one 
who Rock and Roll forgot 
Hmmm, Mmm 
Rock and Roll forgot 
Hmmm, Mmm 

A dusty room 
   filled with, with broken strings 
      A lonely hall 
         where no one will ever sing 
The mem'ries last 
   forever before 
      The moment's past 
         worth nothing worth waiting for more 
Not a word 
   Not a sound 
      'cause I'm the one 
         who'll never be found 
            no, never be found 

Chorus 

Break 

Chorus

Can you feel the mem'ries ( creepin' up on you ) ? 

Can you feel the mem'ries creepin' up on you ? 
Can you see the good times through the black and the blue ? 
Only time will tell you if your love is true 
So can you feel the mem'ries creepin' up on you ? 

Never fear the laughter, Never fear the rain 
Forever and for after, you just fear the pain 
Easy to remember, Harder to forget 
But it's nothin' that you need if it hasn't gotten to you yet 

Repeat first four Verses

Could Be 

Could it be I've been waitin' for the wrong thing ? 
     Could it be you been waitin' for the same ? 
          Can you see that this could be the right thing ? 
     Or is it me just dreamin' on again ? 

I believe no one has the answers 
     But I believe the question's in your soul 
Ah, don't cha know ? 

Can you see that this could be the right thing ? 
     Or is it me just dreamin' on again ? 
          Could it be you been waitin' for the wrong thing ? 
     An' could it be I've been waitin' for the same ? 
Ah, who's to blame ? 

I believe no one has the answers 
     But I believe the question's in your soul 
Ah, don't cha know ?

Comin' on Back 

Jus'  wanna say 
Jus'  wanna say  " Hey " 

I like to keep it clean, lean, an'  mean 
  Said, I'll be your one-man lovin'  machine 
I know you've heard it all before 
  But, Babe, you keep me Comin'  on Back for more, yeah 

Chorus : 

    You got me Comin'  on Back for more 
    Said, Babe, you got me Comin'  on Back 
    You got me Comin'  on 
    You got me...Comin'  

You've got the long, soft hair 
  You've got the leg right up to there 
An'  why you have to talk so sweet ? 
  How can you be such a physical treat ? 
You have the eyes so true 
  You've got me Comin'  on Back to you, yeah 

Chorus 

    Said, C'mon on Back...you've got me...for more...and more...and... 

If one day you should leave 
  I'd feel a pain like you wouldn't believe 
When ev'ry hour seem like a year, 
  A-losin'  you, my greatest fear 
An'  why you have to talk so sweet ? 
  How can you be such a physical treat ? 
Na, nah, nah, now, You have the eyes so true 
  You've got me Comin'  on Back to you, yeah 

Chorus

Sep'rate Ways 

 Babe, What you say today 
When you talk about goin'  our Sep'rate Ways ? 
 Hey, What you do to me 
When you talk about nothin'  but bein'  free ? 
 Whoa, Don't you know it's true 
When I say there ain't been nobody but you ? 
 And, Ooh, What do I do tonight 
When there ain't nobody to hold me tight ?

F ' n '  Fame 

I wanna be a household name 
I wanna be the  " F "  in  " Fame "  
I wanna fly my own jet plane 

I wanna be a big time star 
I wanna drive a fancy car 
Let me just tell you just who you are 

 Want a-thousand girlie-bobs on my lap 
 Want ten lawyers to beat the rap 
 You can keep your damn cocaine 
 I just want the most famous brain 

  Gimme your money, gimme your love 
  Tell me I'm the sun/Son sent from above 
  Tell me the truth, tell me more lies, 
  Tell me I'm the greatest thing through your eyes 

I wanna be a household name 
I wanna be the  " F "  in  " Fame "  
You'll only have yourself to blame 

 I wanna be a household name 
 I might never treat you quite the same 
 Help me play my selfish game 

  I wanna be a household name 
  I wanna be the  " F "  in  " Fame "  
  I wanna drink the best champagne

What I Want  ( and what I get ) 

Chorus : 

   What I want 
an'  what I get 
 Ain't been the same yet 
   What I need 
an'  what I see 
 Ain't what it should be, no 

I been pullin'  for the right thing 
  But end up pushin'  on the wrong 
I been lookin'  for a sure thing 
  But the sure thing sure don't come along 

Chorus 

 Ain't what it could be, well 
 Ain't gonna set me free, no 

Break : 

What I want, what I want, what I 
What I see, what I see, what I 
What I get, what I get, what I 
What I need, what I need, what I 

Chorus 

   What I need and, baby, 
what I get 
 Just ain't been the sa-a-a-ame yet

Pomerado Road 

Chorus : 

You take the Pomerado Road 
 and you roll it on down to me 
You take that long, lonely road 
 an'  you roll it on down an'  see 

   It's then that you realize 
  You're not who you really 
     thought you could be 

Jumpin'  on the backbone 
 Wantin'  so much more 
Talkin'   ' bout the funnybone 
 Then seekin'  out the door 

Chorus 

...should, would be, babe, 
    gonna take it on home, 
     real slow, yeah 

Jumpin' , Slippin' , Sliddin' , Oooh, yeah

Motoman 

Motoman, mowin'  down the road 
    Talkin'   ' bout the two-wheeled story he told 
                         I said now, 
Motoman, livin'  from a pack 
    Ain't got time for anybody hangin'  on his back 
                         I said now, 
Motoman, lookin'  for a thrill 
    Flyin'  with the twin-V up that hill 
                         I said now, 
Motoman, mowin'  down the road 
    Talkin'   ' bout the two-wheeled story he told 
                         I said now, 
Motoman, mowin'  down the road 
Motoman, mowin'  down the road 
Motoman, mowin'  down the road 
Motoman, mowin'  down the road 

Motoman, Motoman, Motoman, Motoman

Tall, Light, & Ugly 

   Hey, baby, don't cho know, don't cho know 
         there's no one who can love you 
                        like I do? 

        Don't cho know?  Don't cho know? 

    Hey, baby, I ain't crazy no more 
Tall, light, and ugly and it's knockin'  at your door 
    Hey, darlin' , tell me what cho gonna do? 
Don't cho know how hard it was for me to get to you? 
    Hey, baby, I'd still be your lovin' fool 

Chorus : 

        Coulda , shoulda , woulda , baby, 
           I'm the one who put it to ya 
             Just like ya told me to 

              Mornin' , noon, and night 
           I always try to treat cha right 
        Oh, what else could a poor boy do? 

    Hey, baby, I said, who could ask for more? 
So sweet an'  lovely, you could make the rich feel poor 
    Hey, darling, tell me what cho gonna say? 
Don't you know how hard it was for me to go away? 
    Hey, baby, I'll still be your lovin'  fool 

Chorus 

    Hey, baby, I ain't crazy no more 
Tall, light, and ugly and it's waitin'  by your door 
    Hey, darlin' , tell me what cho gonna do? 
Don't cho know how hard it was for me to get to you? 
I said, don't cho know how hard it was for me to get to you? 
Tell me, don't cho know how hard it was? 

        Don't cho know?  Don't cho know?

I Can't Kill My TV 

" Hey, Spud, Spud, where's the remote, man? 
No, the remote...You had it last, man, I saw you... 
Spud, where's the remote?  Where's the remote, Spud? 
Where's the remote ! " 

I can't kill my TV 
It's become a part of me 
Ain't there anybody who can set me free ?  

Break : 

Baby, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh 
Oh, baby, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh 

I'm an infomercial with nothin'  ta sell 
I'm a heaven-sent product goin'  straight ta hell 
Jeah, my friends try an'  tell me, said, it's just as well 
I'm a superficial man in an unreal world 

Break 

I'm a telethon junkie for a losin'  cause 
Just another dancin'  chicken flashin'   " Please Applause "  
I just can't seem ta let it be 

I can't kill my TV 
It's become a part of me 
Ain't there anybody who can, 
Ain't there anybody who can, 
Ain't there anybody who can set me free ?  

Dyin' on Saturday 

Got myself a calendar the other day 
Found it in a little shop along the way 
Wrote down three things I need to do 
An'  I'm on my way 

Tusesday, food shoppin' , gonna buy me some fruit 
Thursday, downtown, gonna get me a suit 

An' I'm Dyin'  on Saturday...Dyin'  on Saturday 
Nothin'  more I got ta say, 
I'm Dyin'  on Saturday, an'  I'm on my way, 
'cause I just can't...stay, 
I'm Dyin'  on Saturday...Dyin'  on Saturday 
Dyin'  on Saturday...Nothin'  more I've got ta say, 
Dyin'  on Saturday... 

I can't see you anymore 

     I don't know what to do 
    I don't know what to say 
      I don't know where to go 
   to hide my heart away 

     An'  I can't see you anymore 
    Could it be the last time 
      or the time before ? 
   No, I can't see you anymore 
       Could it be the first last time 
  that I know for sure ? 

     You say you don't know what to do 
    You say you don't know what to say 
      But you found out where to go 
   to hide your heart away 

     You can't see me anymore 
    Could it be the last time 
      or the time before ? 
   You can't see me anymore 
       Could it be the first last time 
  that you know for sure ? 

Break

     What more can we do ? 
    What more can we say ? 
      An'  where should we go 
   to find yesterday's love today ? 

     An'  I can't see you anymore 
    Could it be the last time 
      or the time before ? 
   Oh, I can't see you anymore 
       Could it be the first last time 
  that I know for sure ? 
     I just can't see you anymore 
    Could it be the last time... 
      of a time before ?

No Nonce Sense 

There was a full moon this mornin'  
And the sun was shinin'  all last night 
This is the way I been feelin'  
       not so right 

I went for a stroll up the  "top" walk 
An' ev'ryone was runnin'  by 
I said stop and let's talk 
       before you pass away an' ... 
I don't know where they're goin' , 
       but they're on their way 
What more can I say ? 
  I hope they're in today 

Green is the grass I been seein'  
But it grows in my living room 
Blue is the sky I'll be feelin'  
       all too soon 

There was a square in the round one 
But there is a triangle in my mind 
What was the one in the masses 
       who we left behind ?  
What more can I say ?  
  I hope He's in today

Razed on Rock 'n' Roll 

We got funk 
   We got soul 
We got blues 
   so I'm told 
We got everything from jive to swing 
and one thing in between 

1st  Chorus : 

    We were raised on Rock 'n' Roll 
    Gettin'  blazed to soothe our souls 
    Purple Haze took it's toll 
    Razed on Rock 'n' Roll 

You can dance 
    You can sing 
You can prance 
    You can dream  ( Dream ) 
We got everything to groove the scene, yeah, 
with one thing in between 

2nd  Chorus : 

    We were raised on Rock 'n' Roll 
    Gettin'  blazed to soothe our souls 
    Crazy crazed to smoke our bowls 
    Razed on Rock  'n'  Roll 

Feel the drums 
    Feel the bass 
Feel the lead 
    in your face 
We got everything and in between 
to make you jump and scream 

1st & 2nd  Chorus...   

          California Countre' 

California Countre' 

I've rode more waves 
             than horses 
Worn more sandals 
         than boots 
 Well, I got palm trees 
instead of tumbleweeds 
Yep, I sure nuff  
        know my roots 

  I'm California Country 
Laid back as the setting sun 
       California Country 
I'll rest when all the fun is done 

I've seen more coastline 
             than prairie 
More shorts 
than chaps 
I know  ' bout brand names 
           but not brandin'  
Lost more shades 
than cowboy hats 

  I'm California Country 
Laid back as the slowest tide 
       California Country 
I'll rest after I let it slide 

Break : 

Well, I've been to Hollywood 
        But not by Texas way 
I've seen Rodeo Drive 
But that don't make me Western 
                     like it should 

  'cause I'm California Country 
Laid back as a dolphin's sigh 
                 California Country 
I'll rest when the earthquakes die 
  I'm California Country 
Laid back as a moonlight ride 
       California Country 
I'll rest on the other side 
  I'm California Country 
  I'm California Country, yeah... 
  I'm California Country 
       Yippie Ki  " Hey "  
Yippie Ki, Yippie Ki  " Hey "  
  I'm California Country, yeah 
       California Country, yeah 
  I'm California Country, yeah, well 
              Laid back 
More palm trees than tumbleweeds, yeah 
       California Country 
  I'm California Country

Love for Love  ( Somethin'  for Nothin'  ) 

She told me my love meant nothin'  
I didn't know what to do 
So I said,  " My love is somethin'  for nothin'  
and I felt an awful lot o'  nothin'  for you "  

I told  'er,  " Nothin'  will last forever 
Nothin'  I say  ( , I say, )  is true 
Nothin'  could keep us together 
And nothin'  is enough and good for you "  

She told me there's somethin'  missin'  
She told me there's somethin'  wrong 
So I said,  " My love is somethin' for nothin'  
and I've felt an awful lot o'  somethin'  for you so long "  

I told  'er,  " Somethin'  is old and somethin'  is new 
Somethin'  I said  ( , I said, )  is always true 
Somethin'  I heard  ( , I heard, )  could break my heart 
But there's a-somethin'  that could never keep us apart 

But nuthin'  is somethin'  and somethin'  is gone 
I'm tired o'  feelin'  nothin'  from dusk till dawn 

        And if ya don't feel somethin' , 
               nothin' ain't nothin'  
           If ya don't feel somethin' , 
               nothin'  ain't nothin'  "  

I told  'er,  " My love meant somethin'  "  
She didn't know what to say 
So I said,  " My love is somethin'  for nothin'  
and, if ya don't feel nothin' , I'll be on my way "   

Repeat Stanzas 2 & 5 and then 6 twice

She told me my love meant...nothin'  

One Born Ev'ry Minute  ( for a pretty face ) 

   You're out drinkin'  with a good friend of yorn 
Come across a lady fair 
   You start thinkin' ,  " Is there somethin'  there, 
behind her eyes, within her smile ? "  
   And all...the while 

Chorus : 

You know there's one born ev'ry minute 
   for a pretty face 
Is she more than just skin deep ?  
There's one born ev'ry minute 
   for a pretty face 
Look long and hard 
   before you leap 

   In between the lines is where you'll decide :  
Is she real or make-believe ? 
   You start feelin'  fine and you think you see somethin'  there, 
the way she moves, and through her voice, 
   it seems...you got no choice, 
   'cause there's 

Chorus 

Yeah, there's one born ev'ry minute 
   for a pretty face 
Well, sugar and spice don't mean ev'rything's nice 
You better start thinkin'   'bout thinkin'  twice 
   Some sound advice 
'cause there's one born ev'ry minute 
   for a pretty face 
If she catches your eye, make sure you get it back 
'cause black can be white and white can be black 
   and that's a sure fact 
There's one born ev'ry minute 
   for a pretty face 
Well, what cho see ain't always what cho get 
It's how well ya know an' not who you've met 
   and that's a sure bet 
There's one born ev'ry minute 
   for a pretty face 
Young boy time will not tell 
But all's swell if it ends well 
  Ah, what the hell 
There's one born ev'ry minute 
   for a pretty face 

It's much more than just a cliche'  
It's much more than just a cliche'  
One born ev'ry minute anyway...  

     She may be good lookin'  
It's much more than just a cliche'  
        but nothin's cookin'  

                Sucker

Mary Go  ' round 

              She been talkin'   'bout a-leavin'  
         She been talkin'   'bout a-stayin'  'round 
              She been talkin'   'bout believin'  
                I been talkin'   'bout deceivin'  
                          all over town 
She's a heart-stompin' , honky tonkin' , mean missy, 
                        merry-go-round 

                I see her eyes in the mornin' , 
              never seem ta see  'em at night; 
                         just ain't right 
                   It's the dark that I hate 
                 Guess I'll just have to wait . . . 
                    for dawn's early light 
 She may be a five-timin' , lip-primin' , mean missy, 
                        merry-go-round 
                     Yeah, all over town 
                             Get up ! 

Break : 

I try an'  tell myself,  
  " I just don't care "   
but her love's not somethin'  
  that I'm s'pose'  ta share 
I try an'  stop myself 
from feelin'  so blue 
I'm only guessin'  
but I'm thinkin'  that her love 
just ain't true 

                  I been talkin'  'bout a-leavin'  
            I been talkin'  'bout a-hangin'  'round 
               She been talkin'  'bout believin'  
                 I been talkin'  'bout deceivin' . . .  
                          all over town 
She's a heart-stompin' , honky-tonkin' , mean missy, 
                        merry-go-round 
 She may be a five-timin' , lip-primin' , mean missy, 
                        merry-go-round 
   Yeah, she's a honky-tonkin' , heart-stompin' , 
                     mean misty missy, 
                        merry-go-round 

                        Mary go  'round 
                          and  'round... 

Mary go heart-stompin'  
   Mary go honky-tonkin'  
      Mary go five-timin'  
         Mary go lip-primin'  

                        Mary go  ' round 
                          and  ' round... 

                             Mary, just

LONG GONE WRONG 

    What I've gone and done 
    and where I've done and gone 
        Seein'  long from wrong 
        is seein'  wrong for long 

    I been wond'rin'  'bout a-what I'm doin'  
    She been wond'rin'  'bout a-what I done 
        I been thinkin'  'bout a-where I'm goin'  
        She been thinkin'  'bout where I done gone 

Chorus : 

Oh, oh, I just can't take it 
Whoa, oh, oh, a-what's a-goin'  on ? 
    Oh, oh, why don't we forsake it ? 
    It's been a long, long, long, long wrong 
                  Yo-oh-way-a-hey 
        It's been a l-o-n-g wrong 
         

    She been kickin'  for what I got bummin'  
    I been kickin'  me for what I bum 
        She been hopin'  for what I got comin'  
        I been hopin'  for what I become 

Chorus 

    There ain't been no where tomorrow 
    There ain't been no how today 
        There ain't been no joy, no sorrow 
        and this has-been is on his way 

Chorus

Without You 

I been drinkin'  
I been thinkin'  
about you 
without you 

I been thinkin'  
I been drinkin'  
without you 
about you 

Ya left me flat 
You know where I'm at 
Without you 
Without 

I been smokin'  
I been broken 
without you 
about you 

I been broken 
I been smokin'  
about you 
without you 

Ya took my soul 
Why did I have ta go ? 
Without you 
Left me blue 
Without you 
Without

Love Ain't Blind  ( it hits my heart ev'ry time ) 

I met  'er at a truck stop 
Her hours were long 
like  'er hair 
She talked about the men 
who'd done  'er wrong 
Same old song 

Still, I couldn't keep my eyes off 
a-listenin'  ta her bend my ear 
She took the time to tell me 
she lived near to here 

So after hours 
I found her alone 
but with me 
She said I should make this my home 
sweet home 

The passion threw me 
Then she caught me 
like nobody can 
She said,  " I hope you understand  -  
I'm not ready for another man "  
Oh, no 

Chorus : 

And it's the hard lovin'  
that's so easy to find 
And it's a hard lesson 
that keeps crossin'  my mind 
Love ain't blind 
it hits my heart ev'ry time 
Oh, yeah 

Her name was April 
I met  'er in the spring 
by the falls 
She spoke o'  the joy 
life couldn't bring 
Same old thing 

We talked forever 
sittin'  by the end of the world 
She let me know I could stay 
I hoped for the whole way 

We walked till sunset 
darkened the day 
with the night 
I knew I'd found me a new friend 
heaven did send 

The passion threw me 
Then she caught me 
while holdin'  my hand 
She said,  " I hope you understand  - 
I'm not ready for another man "  
Oh, no 

Chorus 

Break : 

Will she ever 
come my way ? 
I wonder,  " How many tomorrows ?  
How many todays ? "  
So here I sit 
waitin'  patiently 
till some fine lookin'  woman 
fin' ly comes up to me 
and says,  " I hope you understand  - 
said, you could be the man "  
Oh, yeah 

( Chorus ) 

And it's the hard lovin'  
that's so easy to find 
But it's a soft feelin'  
that keeps crossin'  my mind 
Love ain't blind 
it hits my heart ev'ry time 
Oh, yeah... 

Love, love ain't blind 
Love, said, love ain't blind 
Love, no, love ain't blind, 
it hits my heart, well, ev'ry single time 
Oh, yeah... 

" Here we go : "  
Cupid, you're a sharpshootin'  fool, yeah 
Hit me so hard 
knocked me off my bar stool 
Cupid, you're a mean little cuss 
I wish I didn't love your arrows so much... 

Nothin'  I can do 

Nothin'  I can do 
                       to change the way I feel about you 
Nothin'  you can say 
                             to make me feel a dif 'erent way 
An'  is there nothin'  I can be 
                                        to make you feel the same way 
about me ? 

In the matter of a moment 
                                      In the twilight of her mind 
I'm a-lessenin'  slowly 
                               from my better time 
So kick-off the night 
                              and bring on the day 
But with the sun or the moon, 
                                       I'd still feel the same old way 

Hold Your Own 

  So you throw a stone 
  But I leave the point alone 

  And as I'm walkin'  away 
  I can plainly hear you say : 

" He can't even hold his own 
  He don't want no broken bones 
  I can see why he's alone 
  He can't even hold his own "  

Huntin'  On Halloween 

" Boo ! "   

Far from Walpurgis Night 
and by the pale moonlight 
we had our rifles packed and ready to go 

I had on a three-piece camouflage suit 
with the eye of a newt 
rolled up in my left shirt sleeve 

There were sixteen hunters and me 
but the swamp took three 
and the quagmire made us move slow 

It didn't look too good 
Then this guy with a sickle and hood 
helped us out by pointin'  the way 

Well, you could hardly see 
till lightnin'  started hittin'  the trees 
after the candle in our Jack-O-Lantern burnt out 

Just then I heard a sound 
and as we turned back around 
we saw a skeleton sportin'  a thirty-aught-six 

We blew that thing away 
just to watch it decay 

  And we knew right then 
     we shouldn't a-been 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

Chorus : 

    Huntin'  On Halloween 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 
          Double Double 
         Toil And Trouble 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

Well, our campsite looked grim 
till The Reaper stepped in 
and did his fertility dance 

Be'lzebub was on the fiddle 
Jack the Ripper in the middle 
and Jerry Garcia on bass 

We decided to go 
long before the second show 
after Jeffery Dahmer asked, 
" What's for dessert ? "  

Prob ' ly should o'  waited for the light 
but it was  Halloween Night 
and there was a one-eyed owl 
singin'  a  Julie Andrews  song :  

" A doe,  ( hoo, hoo )  a deer,  ( hoo, hoo )  
  a female deer,  ( hoo )  a buck, oh ! "  

We shot that owl in the eye 
just to see if it could cry 

And we knew right there 
we oughta beware 
 of Huntin' On Halloween 

(  Chorus  )  

    Huntin'  On Halloween 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 
    If you hear me scream 
      it's just a bad dream 
                   of us 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 
              Ooh, scary 

With Quasimodo off our back,  
we finally found a fresh track 
of the biggest hoofprints we'd ever seen ;   

They led us to a sleepy little hollow,  
but they were awful hard to follow  
due to the crossin'  of a pack o' black cats  

We passed the graveyard stench 
from some zombie wench 
when I spied a mighty ruminant form 

Well, we were sure in luck  -  
it was a two-headed buck 
bigger than the one from three winters before 

Almost gave up hope 
when I looked through my scope 
my crosshairs had split-ends 

I was dreamin'  of a feast 
still had a bead on the beast 
but Lon Chaney was a-humpin'  on my leg 

I made that werewolf cry 
when my shot went high 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

(  Chorus  ) 
         
          Double Double 
         Toil and Trouble 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

On our journey back 
we had a mummy on the rack 
to make-up for the deer that got away 

Between the locusts and the bats 
and the worms and the rats 
it was hard to tell the phantoms from the road 

You can imagine our surprise 
when right and left before our eyes 
stood that same mighty two-headed buck 

Well, we ran that monster down 
till all four antlers hit the ground 
then got out and shot it twice for luck 

        Ah, Red Rum 
               Red Rum 
      I'm glad I got a gun 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

(  Chorus  ) 

    Huntin'  On Halloween 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 
        Ah, Red Rum 
               Red Rum 
       I'm glad I got a gun 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

          Double Double 
         Toil and Trouble 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

               Fire Burn 
                   and 
        Cauldron Bubble 
    Huntin'  On Halloween 

            Trick or Treat 
    we'll eat roadkill meat 
                   from 
    Huntin'  On Halloween

( Unofficial )  Moms NOT 4 drunks Theme song 

Don't want no trouble, don't even own a gun 
I'm just livin'  to have fun 
I read it in the paper, seen it on TV 
but me and them M.A.D.D. mothers, 
well, we just disagree 

I ain't no juvenile, ain't no punk 
but, hell, I drive better 
when I'm drunk 

Chorus :  

And it's one for the money 
            two for the show 
            three to get ready 
      and four to kill... 

Bruised ribs, broken arm, and somethin'  ' bout a patch, 
my poor ol'  drinkin'  buddy, 
I didn't get a scratch 

It was all kind o'  hazy, crashin'  through the wall; 
the first thing I remember, is hearin'  last call 
The judge said some meetin's 
oughta make ya think; 
somethin'  ' bout a higher power 
helpin'  me to drink 

Chorus 

Got my license back for the third time, but it was just my luck - 
It was the county sheriff's daughter 
behind the wheel of that small truck 

After sev'ral beatin's, thought they were gonna leave me for dead 
They dragged me down to the city morgue, 
figured they were gonna scare me some instead 

I've never been as sober. I've never felt so sad, 
starin'  at that sheriff's daughter 
lyin'  on that marble slab 

It's been over fifteen years now...haven't touched a drop 
And all it took was the face of one young girl 
to fin'ly make me stop 

Chorus... 

Whatcha gonna do ?  

Whatcha gonna do when the well run dry, 
                            when the well run dry, 
                            when the well run dry ?  
Whatcha gonna do when the well run dry, 
                            when the well run dry ?  

Whatcha gonna do when the rent check due, 
                            when the rent check due, 
                            when the rent check due ?  
Whatcha gonna do when the rent check due, 
                            when the rent check due ?  

1st  Chorus :  

        I can't help it  ' bout the shape I'm in 
   Ev'rybody tell me that cha play ta win, hmm 
        I can't keep from fallin'  down 
   Someone gotta lift me up off the ground, hmm 

Whatcha gonna say when the rain come down, 
                              when the rain come down, 
                              when the rain come down ?  
Whatcha gonna say when the rain come down, 
                              when the rain come down ?  

Whatcha gonna say when you old and gray, 
                              when you old and gray, 
                              when you old and gray ?  
Whatcha gonna say when you old and gray, 
                              when you old and gray ?  

2nd  Chorus : 

   Ev'rybody tell me that cha play ta win 
        I can't help it  ' bout the shape I'm in, hmm 
   Someone gotta lift me up off the ground 
        I can't keep from fallin'  down, hmm 

Repeat Verses  ( " well run dry / old and gray " )  

2nd  Chorus  ( again )  

Repeat 2nd  Chorus  ( last two lines inverted )  

1st  Chorus  ( last two lines inverted  +  " somebody "  lift me up... )  

Repeat first Verses  (  " well run dry "  )  

the Septic song 

When I was just head high to an asshole 
I used to catch everybody's shit 
Well, now I'm an arm's length to an asshole 
and I just can't seem to get rid of it 

  Yeah, when I was just head high to an asshole 
  I learned awful fast how to keep my mouth shut 
  Oh, when I was justa head high to an asshole 
  I tried to keep myself out of that rut 

Chorus :  

    And when everyone was passin'  the news 
    Lordy knows that this old boy had the butt of the blues 
    You kinda grow up thinkin'  just like a fool 
    Learnin'  all your life from a brown eye's view 

Oh, when I was just head high to an asshole 
I used to hate to stand in line 
Oh, yes, when I was a head high to an asshole 
I'd always be that brown-nosed kid behind 

  But then one fine day while waitin'  for a movie downtown 
  It was such a fine feelin'  as I had never found 
  Yeah, I use to be a head high to an asshole 
  till some pretty little lady accidentally turned around 

    Well, now I'm just an asshole 
    And my woman keeps tellin'  me,  " Come on back to bed "  
    Yeah, some folks still call me a flush-lovin'  asshole 
    'cause I just can't seem to stay 
    I just can't keep away 
    I just can't seem to stay 
    out o' the head 

Chorus 

Nada  ( por tu )  

Walkin'  down the street 
Lookin'  for some  " sweets "  
It's gonna be a good day 

Lookin'  straight ahead 
See those fine curves 
It's gonna be a good day 

Said,  " Hey there, honey, 
           what cho got for me ? "  
Without missin'  a beat 
she left this little treat :  

She said,  " Nada... y nada por tu..."  

Head hung low 
Where the hell to go ?  

She said,  " Nada... y nada por tu..."  

That's what she said 

She said,  " Nada... y nada por tu..."  

? Que' pasa, mujer ?  Belleza... 

She said,  " Nada... y nada por tu..."  

Vanuatu Post 

            Gonna mail a letter from Vanuatu 
From where the water's warm as the skies are blue 
            Hope it's dry when it gets to you 
          Gonna mail my letter from Vanuatu 

            Gonna mail a letter from Vanuatu 
    If your a-swimmin' , you can send one through 
  Don't need to lick no stamp when the postage due 
           Gonna mail my letter from Vanuatu 

                      " Where's my snorkel ? "  

       Yeah, gonna mail a letter from Vanuatu, ah 
        I got my mask and fins, I'll get it right to ya 
               If I drown, I was glad I knew ya 
          Gonna mail my letter from Vanuatu, ah 

         Still gonna mail a letter from Vanuatu, ah 
    Don't hold your breath, I'll try an' get it right to ya 
             If I drown, sure was glad I knew ya 
        Gonna mail my letter from Vanuatu, ah, ah 

Break : 

Gonna mail my letter from Vanuatu 
Gonna mail my letter from Vanuatu 
Such a tropical place with such a pretty view 
Gonna mail my letter... from Vanuatu, ah, ah, ah  

             " Gonna wake up with the fishes "  

It all comes  ' round 

Well, if there's a harder road now, 
     distance holds the softness 
     but the end would seem just costless 
     had your dreams no cross to bear 

And, if there's a darkened road now, 
     sunrise holds the brightness 
     but the picture would seem sightless 
     had your dreams been always fair 

       What is lost is sometimes found 
       What is out and in of bounds 
       can be trying 
       dissatisfying 

                       It all comes  ' round 

If there's a longer road now, 
     ending holds the shortness 
     but ships at times seem  " portless "  
     Have your dreams no harbor's door ? 

And, if there's a windin'  road now, 
     starlight holds the straightness 
     but paths, at times, seem fateless 
     Have your dreams been drawn so poor ?  

       What is false is sometimes true 
       What is them and then is you 
       can be surprising 
       so comprimising 

                       It all comes  ' round...  

Break : 

Sometimes life just seems so plus and minus 
                               such low and highness 
                                so slide with ev'ry rule 
Sometimes life just seems so mystifyin'  
                           sometimes inspirin'  
                       so don't you play the fool 

So, if there's a harder, darkened, longer, windin'  road, now 
                      distant sunrise, ending starlight shows 

                       It all comes  ' round...  

Play The Whole Night Away 

   Maybe I'm growin'  wiser 
or maybe I'm just blue 
   but I'm thinkin'  ' bout back 
when I was just twenty-two 

   I know I'm still a young man,  " Ha "  
but someday I'll be old 
   be on my front porch rockin'  
but it won't be rock 'n' roll, ah, no  

1st  Chorus : 

         So, come on 
            Let's go 
We're ready to rock 'n' roll 
        We're gonna 
Play the whole night away... 

   Well, livin' , it ain't as easy 
and sometimes ain't as fun 
   as hoppin'  bars in fancy cars 
when I was just twenty-one 

   Well, now those days are over 
but my blood, it don't run cold 
   so I'm in my new car rememb'rin'  
you're never too old to rock 'n' roll, ah, no 

2nd  Chorus : 

         So, come on 
            Let's go 
   Ev'rybody rock 'n' roll 
        We're gonna 
Play the whole night away... 
    Wha'  cho say, baby... 
Play the whole night away...

          PLEasy Listening 

The Other Side Of The Sea 

Said, I can feel it in my bones, 
oh, where I'm bound to be; 
afar across the water, 
across the deep blue sea 

I can hear her distant call 
beckoning me to leave 
I can almost see her misty face, 
it's just too much to believe  

Chorus : 

       that she's waiting 
            just for me 
           Anticipating 
         to set me free 
    There ain't no debating 
    'cause I'm bound to be 
      over and over again 
  The Other Side Of The Sea 

Said, I can feel it in my heart, 
oh, where she's bound to be; 
lovely is this lady 
who's grown so deep in me 

I can almost feel her skin, 
softer than the dove 
I can hear her gently cooin' , 
speakin'  of our love, yeah 

Chorus 

Break : 

Whoa, oh, oh, it's deeper than the ocean 
Wider than these lands 
Higher than the skies 
Oh, oh, oh, I've got an awful sweet notion 
and I'm climbin'  aboard 
and settin'  my sails 
just to see that woman's eyes 

Said, I can feel it in my soul 
Oh, where we're bound to be; 
endless as the rolling waves 
upon that deep blue sea 

Chorus... 

Watch the seagulls fly 
Feel the spray from the ocean 
It'll never go dry  -  
Talkin'  ' bout my 
love and devotion 

The Other Side Of The Sea 
Ooh, where I'm bound to be 

Unable to bide time  ( concerning you ) 

I can't wait 
              to get you home 
              to see that smile 
when we're all alone 

I can't wait 
              to feel your touch 
Oh, girl, I think that I might 
          love ya just a 
          little too much 
'cause I can't wait 

I can't wait 
              till your by my side 
         next to me in ecstasy 
with nothin'  to hide 

I can't wait 
              to kiss you 
                    soft and slow 
sayin'  all the things 
              that you already know 
I can't...wait 

No, I can't wait 
                    to take you there 
bring you back and 
                    then again and 
                    then to where 
I can't wait 
          where and when 
I can't wait 
      now and then 
I can't wait 

1st  Break : 

Sooner than later 
 Oh, the earlier the better 
Ah, there's got to be somehow 
 to be together here an'  now 
Oh, ain't nothin'  more to say 
 I can't hold out another day 
I can't wait 
No, no, no 
I can't wait 

2nd  Break 

3rd  Break : 

I can't wait 
              to get you home 
              to see that smile 
when we're all alone 
I can't wait 
              to have you 
          all to myself 
Girl, you know 
              there 'ill never be 
                          nobody else 
I can't wait 
No, oh, oh 
I can't wait 
Hey, 'ey, 'ey, 
I can't wait 
          where and when 
I can't wait 
      now and then 
I can't wait 
 Let's do it again 

1st  Break 

No, I, I just can't...wait  

" She's not here yet, is she ? ... I guess I'll just have to ... wait ! "  

You're My Fav'rite Place To Be 

      I try to be careful not to hold on too tight 
      And I'm hopeful that I'll treat you right 
      Giving you some room to move 
      Giving you some space to breath 
      And I believe that, near or far, 
      where I'm at is where you are 

      'cause You're My Fav'rite Place To Be 
           an'  you're the only one for me 

      Anything your heart desires 
      Everything your love inspires 

      'cause you're the only one for me 
           an' You're My Fav'rite Place To Be 

      Everything your love inspires 
      Fillin'  up my heart's desires 
      And I believe that, near or far, 
      where I'm at is where you are 

     'cause You're My Fav'rite Place To Be 
           an'  you're all that my eyes can see 
         yes, you're the life that breathes in me 
    'cause, You're My Fav'rite Place To Be 

      Anything your heart desires 
      Everything your love inpires 
                You're the light that shines in me 
                You're the soul that sets me free 
      And I believe that, near or far, 
      where I'm at is where you are 

     'cause You're My Fav'rite Place To Be 
               You're the only one for me 
       Yes, You're all that my eyes can see 

       Yes, You're My Fav'rite Place To Be...  

TWO HEARTS 

She says,  " Do you love me ? "  
  He says,  " I do. I do... 
There's no one above you "  
She says,  " I know that it's true "  

Chorus :  

          TWO HEARTS 
           livin'  as one 
             One heart 
         shinin'  like sun 
             Ev'ry day, 
       they've just begun 
            Ev'ry night, 
         TWO HEARTS 
           livin'  as one 

Running in circles ; 
never looking inside 
Till someone worth loving 
makes you open your eyes 

  He says,  " Do you love me ? "  
She says,  " I do. I do... 
There's no one above you "  
  He says,  " I know that it's true "  

 Chorus...  

GIVE WHATCHA GET 

Chorus :  

Give whatcha get 
          and 
get whatcha give 
It's an easy solution 
          and 
a simple way to live 

   The life you choose to lead 
         is the life you follow 
  The dreams you dream today 
    can be the dreams you live 
               tomorrow 
There's no more time to borrow 

 You lay in the bed you make 
        ( Bed you make )  
       Take what you give 
     and give what you take 
        Make no mistake 

Chorus 

You get whatcha give 

          Do unto others 
   as you do unto yourself 
  Your sisters and brothers, 
 said, are your mental wealth 
       Do it for your health 

 You sow only what you reap 
        ( What you reap )  
       Keep what you give 
    and give what you keep 
      if love is your belief 

Chorus 

You get whatcha give... 
       get whatcha give...  

Love and Care 

As the child lies in bed, 
asleep from all the day, 
there's a kiss upon his head; 
More than words can say 

And in the morning, when awake, 
the sun shines on the floor 
Another day to take 
She thinks he's giving so much more 

But that's the only way 
her thought of love conceives 
And that's the only way 
her heart of love believes 

Chorus : 

Ooh, ooh, ooh, 
 Love and Care 
Oh, oh, oh, 
The soul we share 
Ooh, ooh, ooh, 
 Love and Care 
Ah, ah, ah, 
All time is here 

As she lies upon her bed, 
after the years have passed away, 
the mem'ries for her head 
are the life of her today 

And in the weekend afternoons, 
when her time had seemed so slow, 
has the day gone by so soon, 
just after flowers and  " hello " ?  

But that's the only way 
a mind of love retrieves 
And that's the only way 
a heart of love believes 

Chorus 

Break : 

Time 
to be lost in a feeling 
Time 
for emotional healing 
Time, 
all the senses are reeling ;  
back to the place 
where we're given our space 
Through the wide 
and through the narrow 
Past the nest 
and catch the sparrow 
All is only for to borrow 
So, keep your love of today 
on tomorrow 

'cause that's the only way 
your thought of love can see 
And that's the only way 
your heart of love believes 

Chorus...  

Just Because  ( of who you are ) 

When I saw you, 
when I saw you, 
I knew 
When I heard your voice 
go through my soul 

And then you moved 
so smooth 
I knew, there and then, 
I'd found someone true 

Chorus : 

Just Because of who you are 
Just Because of who you really are...  

So, I tried my best 
to show you my heart 
and confess with the rest 
But I blew my cool - 
a stumblin'  fool 
painted shades of blue 

Chorus 

Break : 

    I know that you are the greatest height 
              that I ever tried to climb 
    I feel like I'm losin'  my mind, 
              to miss out on one so devine 

Chorus...  

SALON SONG 

      You take a little off the top 
   and don't leave them sides alone 
     I'll worry about  " the bottom "  
            and, by the way,  
      " Can I take you home ? "  

    Oh, those little curls of protein 
      wrapped around your hand 
       Little tubes of Brylcreem, 
          put it where you can 

    Oh, won't cha slide that comb 
            right through me 
      a-Lean in just a little more 
                Oh, yeah 
    Show me your stylish cruelty :  
      lay the mirror on the floor 
               Oh, yeah 

      You take a little off the top 
and don't cha leave them sides alone 
    Ah, honey, please don't stop 
            and, by the way,  
      " Can I take you home ? "  

Break 

      Just take a little off the top 
  and don't leave them sides alone 
     I'll wonder about the bottom 
            and, by the way,  
 " Can I please take you home ? "  

THE LEPRECHAUN SONG 

" Hide the wee ones  -  it's a bit of a bawdy tale, it tis "  

'cause I caught meself a Leprechaun ;  
            caught  'im by the balls 
And don't think  ' twas an easy task 
a-cause there so damn small... 

" The Leprechaun, that is...ah, who am I foolin'  ?  
His wee, green nuggets :  tiny as a fairy's eye, they were "  

I told  'im that I'd heard the tales, 
that now I'd have  'is gold 
He tried to piss right down me leg 
and here's what I was told :  

" Did you ever stop to think 
  that I would have the kitchen sink, in clovers, 
  if I had a pot of gold ?  
  Would I be a-wanderin'  through the woods 
  a-pickin'  Shamrocks for me goods, 
  Saints preserve us, 
  if I had a pot of gold ? 
  Why, I'd be lyin'  on the beach 
  with a Lassie within reach, 
  ya daft twit, 
  if I had a pot-full, 
  if I had a pan-full, 
  if I had a handful - 
  if I had a pot of gold "  

So, whilst he talked, unknownst to me, 
            I'd lost me tiny grip 
He danced and cheered, cursed and spat, 
                and then gave me the slip 
But a- ' fore he went upon  'is way, 
                 he turned and winked  'is eye; 
Pulled down his pants for  " an Irish Moon ", 
then said this to make me cry :  

" Did you ever stop to wonder :  
  Might be magic that you're under 
  'cause it's for sure I have a pot of gold 
  I've tricked the worst and tricked the best 
  To save me gold, I'll never rest 
  'cause, it's for certain, I have a pot of gold 
  Ah, there'd be  ' Wigs on the Green '  
  if me gold is ever seen 
  'cause it's for sure I have a pot-full, 
  ah, I've got a lot-full, 
  ah, let's face it, 
  I'm a rich wee bugger  -  
  'cause it's for sure I have a pot of gold "  

So, if someday you hap upon 
                   a Wily Leprechaun, 
you'd be cursed to try your luck 
with that Irish little ffffff...man 

So, don't struggle with your thoughts of gold 
  and heed these words from me : 
Save yourself the tussle - 
Stick to the Lottery 

" Ah, as sure as Shamrocks and Shillelaghs, 
             Truer words were never spoken 
  Uh, hey, 'ey, 'ey, what are you lads doin' over there ? 
               'ey, that Blarney Stone's for kissin', 
               not that sort o' thing 
  Jesus, Mary, and Joseph ! … 
               Crazy Irishmen "

GIVE ME TIME 

Chorus : 

  Give Me Time 
                       to take the best of things 
  Give Me Time 
                       to leave the worst behind 

        Don't wanna be you 
                                     Don't wanna be me 
      Every little thing 
                              gonna be the same 
        If it's all that 
                          you're gonna see 

      It could be less 
                             It could be more 
        All I know is 
                          that it looked the same 
      with my 
                  fat head through the door 

Chorus 

        It could be you 
                              It could be me 

      Don't wanna be right 
                                    Don't wanna be wrong 
        There ain't nothin' 
                                   that cha can't get through 
      with the meaning 
                               of the song 
        and the feelin' 
                             comes along 

Chorus 

Break 

Chorus 

  Give Me Time 
                       to see the best of you 
  Give Me Time 
                       to leave the worst behind 
  Give Me Time 
                       to feel the best in you 
  Give Me Time 
                       to see you smile 
  Give Me Time 
                       just to see you smile 

THERE'S A NEW WORLD WAITING 

Tell me of your Love 
and I'll tell you if it's True 
Because I know a man 
who's lonely days are through 

He told me of her eyes ;  
brown sweetness in their hue 
He told me how her skin 
could make a newborn baby blue 

Chorus : 

            Once in a lifetime, 
        when the timing is right, 
THERE'S A NEW WORLD WAITING 
         for him and her tonight 

Tell me of your Truth 
and I'll tell you if it's Love 
Because I know a girl 
who's prayers were answered from above 

She told me of his heart; 
soft, red ribbons in her mind 
She told me how his soul 
could cause her whole wide world to shine 

Chorus 

Break : 

          Her and him today, yeah 
          Her and him tonight 
          Her and him tomorrow 
THERE'S A NEW WORLD WAITING 
          for him and her tonight 

THERE'S A NEW WORLD WAITING 
                   Anticipating 
THERE'S A NEW WORLD WAITING 
          for him and her tonight 

More Love To Give 

     There's been days  -  
     emotions slipping away 

     There's been times 
     mem'ries were blank to my mind 

Ev'rything seems to be what it is not 
and I'm always giving it less than I've got 
So, I'll reach deep inside me and let it all out 
Yes, I'll show the world what I'm really about 

Chorus : 

'cause I've got 
More Love To Give 
Yes, I've got 
More Love To Give 
Yes, I've got 
More Love To Give 
Yes, I have more love 
        I have more love 

     In you, I see 
     what I've been hiding in me 

     Games you play  -  
     meanings won't match what cha say 

Ev'rything seems to be what it is not 
and you're always giving it less than you've got 
So, reach deep inside you and let it all out 
Yes, you'll tell the world what you're really about 

Chorus  (  " You've "  )  

Break :  

Ooh, ah, ooh, ah, ooh... 

Well, I've found myself 
I am real 
I've found the true soul I had lost 
I can express... how I feel, ooh 

     Eye to eye  -  
     expressionless people go by 

     Face to face  -  
     maintain the speed of the race 

Ev'rything seems to be what it is not 
and we're always giving it less than we've got 
So, we'll reach deep inside us and let it all out 
We'll prove to the world what we're really about 

Chorus  (  " We've "  )  

Valerietine Day 

It's no wonder she was born today 
    Sends  'er heart each an'  every way 
  Keeps her selfishness at bay 
It's no wonder she was born today 

Sweetest of spice 
    Ev'rything nice 
  She's all right 
Mmm, hmm, mmm, hm , hmm, yeah 

Wakes up with the children 
    Fed and to school 
  With love all around them, 
they say,  " Mom, you're so cool "  
                 Hey ! 

Ev'ry bedtime story 
    and still wash, cook, and clean 
  She's a fairy " tale / tail "  for daddy 
She's an American Dream, yeah 

It's no wonder she was born today 
    Sends  'er heart each an'  every way 
  See her watch the children play 
It's no wonder she was born today 

" Friday mornin' , 6:14 a.m. , Dr. Roach "  

" February 14th, 19...what ? , 20 inches, 7 lbs, even "  

Valerie...tine... Day  

Blasphemy 

  I sat down with a Preacher Man 
  He told me all about a foreign land 
  I said,  " Hey, Preacher, have you ever been 
              and did you ever go to Mexico ? "  
  He said,  " No, no, I didn't go "  

" So, Preacher, won't cha preach about Mexico 
  Tell me  ' bout the swamplands, 
  tell me  ' bout the snow 
  Tell me what I'll find if I go there 
  Will I meet my Friends or my Family somewhere ? "  
  He said,  " No, no, I didn't go "  

  I laid down with a Workin'  Girl 
  She told me all about the cold, cruel World 
  I said,  " Hey, Woman, do you need a Friend 
              and did you ever go to find your Soul ? "  
  She said,  " No, no, I didn't go "  

" So, Workin'  Girl tell me all about your Soul 
  Tell me  ' bout the love 
  and how your body glows 
  Tell me what you'll find if you go there 
  Will you see your Friends or your Family somewhere ? " 
  She said,  " No, no, I didn't go "  

  I stood up with a Government Man 
  He told me all about this promised land 
  I said,  " Political Man, do you understand 
  and did you ever go to  ' The poverty show '  ? "
  He said,  " No, no, I didn't go "  

" So, Government Man, tell me all about  ' The show '  
  Tell me  ' bout the dream 
  and how the money flows 
  Tell me what you'll find if you go there 
  Will you see the Children or the enemy somewhere ? "  
  He said,  " No, no, I didn't go "  

Break : 

    Can you see The Oceans 
    from a drop in your hand ?  
    Can you see The Deserts 
    from a grain of sand ?  
    Can you know somebody 
    with a look from your eyes ?  
    And do you know what Life will mean  
    after  you die ?  
    I said,  " Oh, no  -   Nobody knows "  

                  Can you see The Heavens 
                  from a gaze at the skies ?  
                  Can you know the hunger 
                  from a baby's cries ?  
                  Can you know the Truth 
                  where the Truth doesn't  " lie " ?  
                  And do you know what Life will mean 
                  before or  after  you die ?  
                  I said,  " Oh, no, does anyone know ? "  

Penitence 

I could say  " I'm sorry "  
I could say  " I care "  
I could say two million things 
three million ways 
It's only for 
the love we'll save 

I could say  " forgive me "  
I'll always be your fool 
I could say  " the lesson's learned, 
don't be concerned, 
it's only for 
the heart you've earned "  

Chorus : 

The storms may rage 
and, still, we roll on 
When I'm weak 
is when 
you're so strong 
How have you 
ever held on 
this long ?  
When you're right 
is when 
I'm all too wrong 
I'm so glad 
you came along 

I could say  " tomorrow, 
I'm sure to change my ways "  
I could say  " today, I feel, 
it's too unreal, 
it's only for 
your trust I steal "  

You could say  " you love me "  
and prove it ev'ry day 
I could say  " I make mistakes ;  
should take it slow,  ' cause 
your my only world, 
you know "  

Chorus  ( inverted Verses )  

   And your the reason 
        for this song

Y-O-U 

     Not even a look 
     Not even a glance 
     Nothin' even close to just 
     one first chance 

     Dinner alone 
     Breakfast for two 
     With one thing missin'  

     Solo and so low 
     I can only look up 

     Perhaps I've been too far down 
     Perhaps a wrong shade of blue 
     Still one thing missin'  

     Don't wanna say  " I'm lonely "  
     Don't wanna believe it's true 
     Still one thing missin'  

     Why ? 
     Oh !...  

Gratitude 

Thanks for the kindness that you've shown to me, 
your grace and your beauty, your brave empathy 
Thanks for the mem'ries ; the love and good cheer 
Thanks for the days and the months and the years 

Chorus : 

    Ooh, ooh, ooh, nothing to do, but thank you 

        Even the times when I did not deserve, 
  when I shouted and fussed till I hit the last nerve 
     Even the moments you were put to the test, 
  you've always proved that you're one of the best 
      friends I could hope for or wish or to want 
    to help me and guide me with such elegance 

Chorus... 

    You've always been there, been there for me 
   I thought I might tell you, so then you can see 
  there's no other treasure I've found or could give 
          to ever repay you, as long as I live 

Chorus... 

                         Thank you

          Kiddie Diddies 

( Always Purgatorial )  Limboland  

Peter Pan at the Pearly Gates 
  waitin'  for the special souls 
 Only Peter Pan can say 
where those souls may go 

           It's a mystery 
         like the one in me 
that wants to jump into the sea 
         and kiss a whale 
          ( Kiss a whale )  

    It's a wond'rous thing 
  like a pauper and a king 
We could starve and dream 
         or eat a snail 
        ( Ooh, Yuckie )  

Tinkerbell at some gates as well 
    waitin'  for the special souls 
      Only Tinkerbell can tell 
    where those souls may go 

       It's still a mystery 
       like the part of me 
that wants to climb up a tree 
 and pull on a monkey's tail 
( Ooh, ah, ooh, ah, ooh, ah )  

        It's a wild thing 
     like a dingalingaling 
like those flowers in spring 
 that make ya wanna sing 
            or cry 
      like a broken pail 
       ( Boo hoo hoo )  

Break : 

    But where are the Lost Boys ?  
What has Captain Hook now done ?  
           Between the gates 
           they find their fates 
                on the moon 
                      or 
                 in the sun 

Repeat stanzas ( in reverse order )  

  Let's just close our eyes 
  and fly...and fly...and fly...  

Burper's Hymn 

It was 
very late one night 
quiet as a kangaroo 
searching for a pouch or two 

But from the room upstairs 
where tenni'  shoes and puppy dog hairs 
fill the floor with gum and more 
there came a funny sound 
and Mom and Daddy turned around 
found soda pop bottles 
on the ground 

And then they looked upstairs 
and said,  
" Hey, you kids, 
  stop that burping up there 
  What will the neighbors say, 
  with you and your sister burping away ?  
  Hey, you kids upstairs 
  you better stop that burping up there "   

Zap Ur Yap Intro 

" One Hundred Times Upon A Time  
the Dragon walked by the Castle window of The Queen and King's Royal Court ( The Royal Court )  -  that is where The King and Queen's Thrones sit.  The Dragon would scare The King so very badly,  The King would always drop his Crown whilst he cleaned it ; though The Queen was rather Brave about the entire affair.   

    ( The Dragon lived in a very old abandoned Castle that had                       ENORMOUS  Black Wooden Gates )   

One day, The King summoned all of His Royal Knights to chase        the Dragon away, but none of the Knights could get inside the  
 Dragon's Castle to do just such, Until, One day,  
 there came the Shiny Purple Knight ( ! )  

The Purple Knight was a Good and Close Friend of  
The King's Wizard and the Wizard had taught the Shiny Purple Knight about The Magic Clap and Zapping the Yap... 
Do you know what a Yap is ?  A Yap is, in fact, your mouth.   
And the Only Way to Zap your Yap is to

Smile and think of Happy and Fun thoughts ;  

yet it must be a HUMUNGOUS Smile and Extra Happy and Fun thoughts  -

              This is the Only Way a Magic Clap will work and
              the Only Way to Start This Song … "  

Zap Ur Yap 

" After I count to Three, Clap Your Hands together and Scream  
' Zap Ur Yap !! '  Just make sure you are thinking Happy, Fun thoughts    and  Smiling Bravely and Brightly...  

Ready ?  -  One, two, three  [  CLAP !  ]  

         Zap Ur Yap ! "  

Looden doodaloo 
Looden doodaloo 
Looden doodaloo 
Loo... 

There once was a Purple, Shining Knight 
who had a Heart of Gold 
One day he went to see The King 
and here's what he was told :  
" There's a Great, Big Dragon out there, 
Big and scary and green 
I want you to chase him far away 
because he's so darn mean "  

So, uh, uh, uh, oh...   
before The Purple Knight began 
the Wizard he did see 
and the wise, wise Wizard told him this 
-  Now listen carefully  -  
" When you want to get things done, 
it's Magic you can be 
Just Clap Your Hands Together 
after counting along with me 
But here's the Magic secret 
I'm telling only you 
To make your Magic clap work right 
and make your Wish come True 
Well,... "  

Chorus :  

You must Smile all the while 
like a Happy Crocodile 
Clap and Smile 
Smile and clap 
It's Magical to 
Zap Ur Yap 

Zap Ur Yap 
Zap Ur Yap 
it's Magical to 
Zap Ur Yap 

Looden doodaloo... 

The Purple Knight at the Dragon's gate 
How will he get inside ?  
" I know "  
We can use our Magic clap 
to open those gates wide 

So, Put Your Hands Together 
after counting along with me 
Get ready for your Magic clap 
and don't forget to 
Zap Ur Yap 

" Ready ? One, two, three  [  CLAP !  ]  
         Zap Ur Yap ! 
          It worked ! "  

The gates are open 
The Purple Knight is in 
The Dragon stood before him 
with a Silly Grin 
And just as the Knight was gonna 
scare him away 
with the Magic clap 
we learned today 
the Dragon raised his scary head 
and said,  
" Hello, isn't it a Beautiful Day ? "  
" Can you believe that ?  
The Dragon said that 
The Dragon said,  
' Hello, isn't it a Beautiful Day ? '  "  

The Purple Knight couldn't believe his ears 
He Laughed so hard 
he sprouted tears 
After years of fears 
The King and Queen were told 
" The Dragon has a Heart of Gold "  

And when the Dragon met The King 
he raised his ears 
and started to Sing 
And when the Dragon met The Queen 
he wagged his tail 
and started to Sing 

" Well, ya know what ?  
I think the Dragon was friend's with The King's Wizard 
'cause the Dragon started Singin'  :  "  

Chorus 

So, now, 
If you'd like this song to end 
here's what you must do :  
You can use your Magic clap 
to see if it's All True 

So, Put Your Hands Together 
after counting along with me 
Get ready for your Magic clap 
and don't forget to 
Zap Ur Yap 

" Ready ? One, two, three  [  CLAP !  ]
         Zap Ur Yap ! "  

" Uh - Oh... "

AMMEMAL DREEM  

Monkeys have little monkey butts,
little monkey butts, little monkey butts
Monkeys have little monkey butts
just like you

El-e-phants have big floppy ears,
big floppy ears, big floppy ears
El-e-phants have big floppy ears
just like you

Geckos have tiny sticky toes,
tiny sticky toes, tiny sticky toes
Geckos have tiny sticky toes
just like you

           They may say you're a human being,
               but that's just an animal's dream
      'cause, just like a camel, you're a mammal
       and I can tell you why

'cause . . . Pot-bellied pigs have a funny wet nose,
a funny wet nose, a funny wet nose
Pot-bellied pigs have a funny wet nose
just like you

And . . . Caterpillars have fuzzy hairy heads,
fuzzy hairy heads, fuzzy hairy heads
Caterpillars have fuzzy hairy heads
just like you

Yes . . . Kangaroos can skip an' hop,
skip an' hop, skip an' hop
Kangaroos can skip an' hop
just like you

            You eat and poo like the animals do,
         so you know it's true when I say to you  -
      " At the very least, you're a scary little beast
        and I can tell you why "

'cause . . . Monkeys have little monkey butts,
little monkey butts, little monkey butts
Monkeys have little monkey butts
just like you

" Hey, wait a minute now . . . you're smarter than a monkey . . .
  I guess you must be human after all . . . isn't that . . . "

just . . . like . . . you and you and you and you and you and you
and you and you and you and you and you and you and you ?!

Prelude 

I have a leaky butt 
I just can't seem to keep it shut 
I ask everyone, but no none knows 
how to keep my buttocks closed 

Maybe I could just hold it in 
and try my best not to break wind 
I dream at night 
and pray all day 
that constipation 
comes my way 

My loose caboose has left the tracks 
and stains are crawlin'  up my back 

You may think that this is gross 
But here's the thing that I hate the most :  
I found a cure, although it hurts, 
but duct tape 
really 
works 

BIG  Blue  Balloon  Man 

There once was an old man lyin'  in his bed 
      These are the very last words he said :  
            He said,  " I been a good man for all o'  my life 
                  I been good at day, I been good at night... "  

So, with his next to last breath, he said,  
      " I think I should do sumethin'  for this world, 
            but sumethin' really, really good... "  

So, he took a deep, deep breath from the center of his soul 
      and, just before he let it let go, 
            he grabbed a giant blue balloon 
                  and, with a mighty, mighty puff, 
                        he blew the whole thing up 

And it was just enough 

I saw big red shoes 
and checkered, green pants 
Before the rest popped up, 
they started to dance  -  
" The pants ! "  

I saw purple suspenders, 
a black and white striped shirt 
When the arms popped out, 
I said,  " Hey, doesn't that hurt ? "  

I saw a silly, silly grin 
and I couldn't believe 
There was a 
Big Blue Balloon Man 
right in front o' me !  

            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            flips and flops 
            There's only one word that'll make  'im stop 
            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            dances bebop 
            There's only one word that'll make  'im stop 
            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            hippity-hops 
            There's only one word that'll make  'im stop 
            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            bounces when he drops 
            There's only one word that'll make  'im stop 
            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            clippity-clops 
            There's only one word that'll make  'im stop 
            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            in The Big Top 
            There's only one word that'll make  'im stop 

            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            Big Blue Balloon Man 

            Big Blue Balloon Man 
            in The Big Top 
            There's only one word that'll make 'im stop...  

The Cocoa song 

       I can't stop with the  choc-o-late 
C-O-C-O-A 
       It's so sad, I've gained a lot 
C-O-C-O-A 

With an inch, inch here 
and a pinch, pinch there 
Here an inch 
There a pinch 
Ev'rywhere an inch pinch 

       I don't care 
       I'll buy bigger underwear 

C-O---C-O---A 

Digit and Fidgets for Spider Webs 

I tried to play my guitar today 
when a big, funny spider 
came along my way 
    With a happy grin 
    he began to spin...  
    a web 
    around 
four of the five fingers 
of my left hand  

He said,  " I'm a-gonna learn you to count to four 
               and nothin'  less and a-nothin'  more "  

And then he made my fingers crawl 
like a creeping spider down the hall :  
             " One, two, three, four 
               and nothin'  less and a-nothin'  more "  

Then, just when I thought that I could play, 
he made me go the other way :  
             " Four, three, two, one 
               We're right back where we a-done begun "  

Now this went on for half the day, 
and it was fun, 
but I wanted to play 
    Then, all at once, 
    I could see, 
    it was left there 
    right in front of me  -  
    My thumb 
    was 
    free !!!  

Between the icky and the sticky I came up with a plan :   
My thumb was free, so I supposed, 
I'd stick my thumb 
right up my nose ( ! )  

But then the funny spider made me play 
and my nose and thumb 
went on their way :  
              " One, two, three, four 
                and nothin'  less and a-nothin'  more "  

Then, just when I thought that I could play, 
the funny, happy spider made me go the other way :  
              " Four, three, two, one 
                We're right back where we a-done begun "  

        I knew now that this had to end, 
        even though I'd made a spider friend 
        My fingers couldn't take much more 
        and my thumb and nose were awful sore 

Well, I fin'ly made the spider say goodbye ;  
I made him chase my friend  -  the fly ( ! )  
              " My hand is free ! "  

And, just to show that I'm not sore, 
I'll make my fingers crawl once more :  
              " One, two, three, four 
                and nothin'  less and a-nothin'  more "  

No Nose Candy, Please 

    Don't eat your boogers 
    Boogers just ain't food 
    Don't eat your boogers 
    Some people think it's just plain rude 
    No, don't eat your boogers 
    You'll make your parents scream 

    You've never heard of  " Booger Ice Cream "  
    You won't see that he wore a  " Booger Hat "  
    There's no such thing as a pretty  " Booger Ring "  

    So, don't eat your boogers 
    Boogers are just plain waste 
    Don't eat your boogers, 
    you may not like the taste 
    No, don't eat your boogers 
    Stick to food instead 

    Don't eat your boogers 
    Keep your fingers out of your head  

Be Brave or Scream On  Halloween  

                           When the bedbugs bite 
                                     it's a scary night 
                       Then the ghosts come out 
           You can hear them float and shout 

   I'm a ghost and I'm feelin' fine and dandy 
    I came here to find your toys and candy 
                                 so that we can play 
                    but your Mommy and Daddy 
                                     scared me away 

                               When the bedbugs bite 
                                         it's a scary night 
                      Then the witches all come out 
                        You can hear them fly about 

She's a witch and she's feelin' fine and dandy 
   She came here to find your toys and candy 
                                    so that she can play 
                        but your Mommy and Daddy 
                                scared that witch away 

                       When the treats are tricks 
                 and the candles have no wicks 
                         Then the lightning strikes 
                           and Mommy and Daddy 
                                          hold you tight 

         Try not to be a Scaredy-Cat bumpkin 
       hiding from the shadows in a pumpkin 

                           Phantom Jack-o-lantern 
                           Phantom Jack-o-lantern 
                           Phantom Jack-o-lantern 
                             Jack-o-lantern Phantom 

                     But you'll be fine and dandy 
                           counting all your candy 
                    If the monsters want to play 
                                  but you don't want 
                                          them to stay 
                          you can always choose 
                           to scare them all away 

                          When the bedbugs bite 
                                    it's a scary night 
                                 but now you know :  

                   If the monsters want to play 
                                 but you don't want 
                                         them to stay 
                         you can always choose 
                          to scare them all away 

         Be Brave or Scream On  Halloween ...  

The Monkey Bread song 

There's Monkey Bread in my head 
I really should go to bed 
I think that I'll stay up instead 
with Monkey Bread in my head 

I put a banana in my ear 
so that I might somehow hear 
the squishy squashy Monkey Bread 
in my head 

So, now I'm swingin'  from the vines 
with Monkey Bread on my mind 
It seems to be there all the time 
that Monkey Bread in my head 

It's far better than 
a coconut up my... nose 

Yes, I've got Monkey Bread in my head 
I really should go to bed 
I think that I'll stay up instead 
with Monkey Bread 
in my head...  

Break 

" Hey !  Someone took my Monkey Bread !  Oh, no ! "  

There's no more Monkey Bread in my head 
I think I'll just go to bed 
and dream a squishy squashy dream 
of Monkey Bread... 
in my head...

In and Out of Shape

Hup !
Da straight line is a 'appy line
   as long as it stay in line
       Oh, da straight line is a 'appy line
as long as it keep in line

Da circle go 'round an' 'round
   like a rollie pollie all through town
       a-but da straight line is a 'appy line
as long as it stay in line

   But den dere da square
sharp, sharp corner ev-er-y-ware
" Ouch, mon "

But den da straight line is a 'appy line
as long as it stay in line
Oh, ya know, da straight line is a 'appy line
as long as it keep in line

   I saw da triangle crawl up a tree
da tree come down, now triangle free
" Yippee, mon "

                              Twister in my 'air
                            Tango in Fandango
                         All you square beware
                         don't wreck my tangle
       " Rectangle  -  like the two-square wassa "

Oh, you know that it's a straight line dat's a 'appy line
       as long as it stay in line
Well, dey say da straight line is a 'appy line
       as long as it keep in line
I tell you, it's a straight line dat's a 'appy line
       as long as it stay in line
Don't cha know, da straight line is a 'appy line
       as long as it keep in line
Well, now ya know, da straight line is da 'appy line
as long as it stay in
as long as it keep in
       as long as it stay in . . . line
" Okay to draw outside the lines sometime, mon"

          mental strummin's 

Wood and Metal 

It's just Wood and Metal 
Just like flesh and bone 
and when it's in your hands 
don't it feel 
right at home 

Let the sound wash over you...  

Break  

It's just flesh and bone 
Just like Wood and Metal 
but when it's in your hands 
don't it feel 
like home 

Let the sound wash over you...  

    Well, shine...through...  

SINGLES  

South Away  

Please see The Hobbit by Master  J.R.R. Tolkien   
Page 178 in my edition   : )   

WON  NATION   

Without variety of Culture 
it's the Same Plain Shame  
There's No fine line between 
stupid and sane  

I'm not  " down "   
I'm a white man  
But I'm around 
with the black and brown man  
We don't fight, 
it ain't right...   

'cause my Might is in my Mind and it's STRONGER than my fists  
You can talk about my Lover or my Brother or Another, 
if that's where you wanna be  
I'll just tell you  " That's not me "  -  
Because I've seen  " The Show "  and know 
which way the World should go  

                It's All...   

Chorus :  

ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
It's All  ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION  

It's who you are and where you've been  
We can't forgive the Sins of History  -  
"  Just DON'T Do It Again !!!  "  
We got ta educate the Children of the bigot till they See, 
in the Future  ( if it's Just )  they'll  be minority  

              We Need...   

( Chorus )  

ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
We Need  ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION  

Break :  

Little by little, 
from the side and from the middle, 
jus'  ta change  " The Human Riddle "  -  
Understandin'  why the skin 
is causin'  screamin'  from within  ( ? )  

We gotta end . 

And then Begin . . .   

a-Justa...   

Repeat  Break  two more times  

( Chorus... )  

ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
a-Justa  ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION  

              We Need...  

ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
We Need  ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION  

                It's All...   

ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
It's All  ONE NATION UNDER GOD  
ONE NATION  

ONE NATION  

ONE NATION  

      WON . . .   

Party or No-Party Politics  

Time's the same, 
                         but things've changed  
People searchin'  
                         everywhere  
Blinded by the Hype 
                              and Games 
plagued by those 
                        runnin'  scared  

Break  

Friends an' Family  
                             to hold onto  
Find your Love 
                      along the way  

When the Whole Wide World  
                                           surrounds you  -  
Look Inside and  
                       Come What May

Chorus :  

Ev' ry  Body wants to Be Somebody  
         Ev' ry  Body  wanna Feel Someone  
                  Nobody wanna leave The Party  
                             ' til All the Dancin' . . . done  

Break  

                           It's Alright in the middle o' the night  
It's okay in the middle of the day, yeah  
                           It's Alright in the middle o' the night,  
it's okay in the middle of the day  

Ev' ry  Body wanna Be Somebody  

Ev' ry  Body wanna Be Somebody  
         Ev' ry  Body  wanna Feel Someone  
                  Nobody wanna leave The Party  
                             ' til All the Dancin' done

                           It's Alright in the middle o' the night  
It's okay in the middle of the day, yeah  
                           It's Alright in the middle o' the night,  
it's okay, okay in the middle of the day

Ev'rybody wanna be somebody
Nobody wanna leave the party
Ev'rybody wanna feel someone
'til all the dancin' done

Ev'rybody wanna be somebody
Nobody wanna leave the party
Ev'rybody wanna feel someone
Gotta learn ta have some fun, well

Ev'rybody wanna be somebody
Nobody wanna leave the party
Ev'rybody wanna feel someone
'til all the dancin' . . .

Please see  STORE  >  INFO

for  Party or No-Party Politics - redux  lyrics

What it is you want from me  

What it is you want from me ?  
  I don't know  

Ev' ry Time I miss your mind, 
  you say  " I told ya so "   

Instrumental Break  

                                                    What it is you see in me ?  
                                                      I don't know  

                                                    When I try to show my mind, 
                                                      you say, " Just let it go "   

Instrumental Break  

                        What's good enough for some  
                         ain't gonna  " cut it "  in the end  

                         Some,  Always tryin'  ta make it break  
                           Instead o'  tryin'  ta make it bend  

                         There's more ta meet the eyes, 
                          when the Heart stays clear 

                           and the Mind is left behind 
                             enough to Feel... To Feel...   
                                  What cho hear . . .   

Instrumental Break  

Repeat 1st two Stanzas without  Instrumental Break  

What it is you want from me ?  
  I don't know  

I've Given All That I Could Give, 
Ya Know, there ain't no more  

                                                     What it is you want from me,
                                                       want from me...  ?

                          Well, I don't...know…

I just don't know . . .   

What it is you want  
What it is you need . . .   

I just don't know  
which way to go . . .   

Grey Thread  

Yeah …   
                      His Bones ain't movin'  like they used to do  
                      His Mind might be missin' a thing or two  
                      His Yesteryears are slippin'  away  

                             He's just Hangin'  On to another day  

                                       Hmmm, just Hangin'  On  
                                 Same Ol'  Thread as Yesterday  
                                             Made up his Mind  
                                           He's still Here to Stay  

                       Don't care  ' bout Wisdom or bein'  Too Rude  
                       Just Livin'  for his Stories and Livin'  for Food  
                       Nuthin'  comes easy,  ' cept gettin'  mo'  Gray  
                       He just Hangin'  On to another day  

                                              It don't seem right, 
                                   but then, it don't seem wrong, 
                              that Anyone should  Last - So - Long  
                              Whatever you do, Whatever you say :  

                          We're All just Hangin'  On to another day . . .   

Forty  Year  In  Heaven  

Chorus :  

    Forty Years In Heaven  
' fore the Devil knows you're gone  
    Forty Years  ' fore the Devil knows you're gone  

    Forty Years since the Angels song  
    Forty Years since they came along  

    Forty Years  ' fore the Devil knows you're gone  

       Tried ta live yer life 
the best you could  

       Always knew the dif 'rence  
' tween bad & good  

       But things can go astray, 
livin'  day by day 
and now it's time for you to be on your way  

Chorus  

Break  

           Little bit o'  luck an'  little bit o'  fate  
           Ya give it all ya got, then sit  'n'  wait  

           Givin'  up the fight with wrong & Right  

           till yer fi...nal  " Good Night "   

           Little bit o'  love an'  a little bit o'  hate  
           Ya give it all ya got, then  Just - You - Wait  

           Givin'  up your fight for Right & wrong  

           till yer fi...nal  " Good Night "   

           Yer fi...nal  " Good Night "   

Chorus  

(  Chorus  )  

    Forty Years In Heaven  
' fore the Devil knows yer gone  
    Forty Years  ' fore the Devil knows yer gone  

    Forty Years since the Angels song  
    Forty Years knowin'  right from wrong  
    Forty Years since the Angels sighed  
    Forty Years since you had died  

           May there be...   

    Forty Years In Heaven  
before the Devil  
knows  
you're  
dead  

Scary little you  

             Who dresses up for Halloween ?  
             Who makes the other Children scream ?  

Chorus :  

             You do, You do, Scary little you do  
             You do, You do, Scary little ...  Boo !  

             Who is a Monster on Halloween ?  
             Who makes a Dan and Mommy scream ?  

Chorus  

             Trick  -  or  -  Treat  
             Smell  -  my  -  Feet  
             Treat  -  or  -  Trick  
             Too many sweets and  You'll  -  be  -  Sick  ( ! )  

Break :  

             Sneak through the streets but  WATCH FOR CARS  
             Scare everyone for Candy Bars  
             You won't be seen  'cause you'll move like a Ghost  
             But when you  STOP  -  you'll scare them the Most   
             " Who scared me so much ? "  They'll point and say :  

Chorus... 

shur ‘twern’t me

Who put the power in the flower ?
Who put the bumble in the bee ?
Who put the minutes in the hour ?
Who put the apple on the tree ?
I don't know who it could be,
I just know . . . it shur 'twern't me

Who put the butter on the fly ?
Who put the lash on your eye ?
Who put the bone in my head ?
Who put the feathers in my bed ?
Well, I don't know who it could be,
I just know . . . it shur 'twern't . . . me

Yes, I don't know who it could be,
I just know . . . it shur . . . 'twern't . . . me
 

Elf  Madness  

Well...   
           Wrap my Present twice ...   
                                                  so that the openin's twice as fun   : )   
Tell  Ol'  Claus  
                     that I've been nice 
                                                and let the Reindeers run  

[  Elf  ]   “ Noooo !  They fly  ( ! ) ” 

" Well, some Reindeers run too "   

[  Elf  ]   " Aahh, You're no fun "   

" Sorry "   

a-Won't cha 
                  build me a Snowman ...   
                                                      but make sure it's Siamese Twins  
Tell  Ol'  Frosty  
                      to tip his hat 
                                         so Wintertime never ends  

[  Various Elfs  ]   " Siamese Twins ?  "  >  " What ?  "  >  " That's not very  Christmasy  ... You're Strange "  >  " Heeheee "   

I know, but ...   

[  Elf  ]   " I think we'll take over from here  -  C'mon guys, let's sing  'em that song that  Santa  always sings to us when we're working at  The  North Pole  "   

[  Various Elfs  ]   " Yeah ! "  >  " Alright "  >  “ Wheeee ! ”

                              Ho...Ho...Ho... Hold it !                                                                                  Don't put your Magic in that Toy  
                              Ho...Ho...Ho... Hold it !  
                            That's for a Girl or Boy :
                          
                         They put the  Magic  in 
                         when they Laugh and Grin  
                         Everyone knows, 
                         when they're at play :  

                         The  Magic  in  the Toys  
                          is from the Girls and Boys ...   

Al - Alright guys ... Take it easy ... Se - Settle down ... Settle down 
a little bit 

[  Avalanche  ]   " Hey !  Hey !  I...I... I got another song I wrote for  
this year too "   

[  Various Elfs  ]   " Ah, I don't know, Avalanche ; You remember      what happened  last  year  ( ? ) "  >  " Yeah ... an' what kinda song is 'No  Horse Open Sleigh '  anyway ? "  >  " Let's ask the Abomin-na-able Snowman what he thinks "  >  " Good idea "  >    " Ehh  ( ? ) “  >  ” There  ' e is ! "  >  "  Avalanche  wants to sing another song this year "

 [ Abominable  Snowman ]  “ Okay ... Another chance ”   

[  Various Elfs  ]   " Cross your Icicles and Candy Canes, guys ( ! ) "  >      “ Heehee ”  

[  Avalanche  ]   " Snowwoman, Snowwoman  -  You melt my heart,  You melt my heart  -  Snowwoman, Snowwoman  -  You melt my heart ... "   

[  Abominable  Snowman  ]  " Oooaah "   

[  Avalanche  ]   " You melt my heart … Snowwoman, Snowwoman ... "

[  Various Elfs  ]   " Hey !!  "  >  " Oooh !!  "   

[  Avalance  ]   " You melt my heart ...  "   

[  Elf  ]   " Avalanche !!   STOP !!!  "   

[  Avalanche  ]   “ You melt my heart ... Snowwoman, Snow... Snow ... Wha... What ?  Hey...  She... She... She... She melts my heart ... What ? Nooo... Aaaahhh !  Not Again !  Not Again ! ... Aaah, Same Thing As   Last Year  ( ! ) ”

Aah ... That's alright, that-that's alright  Avalanche ; You'll get 'em  Next Year, buddy ...  Hey  -  How about you all help me out and  sing along with that 1st song I did ? 

[  Various Elfs  ]   " Sure "  >  " Okay "  >  " Cooool "   

(  Opening  [ 1st four lines of ]  song  )  ...  So Wintertime Never Ends …  It's a Cool Breeze   : )   

[  Various Elfs  ]   " Merry Christmas Everybody  ( ! ) "  >  " Yeah  -  
Merry Christmas "  >  " And A Happy New Year  ( ! ) "  >  " My Gingerbread Man fell into the Eggnog "  >  " I still think that guy  was a couple o'  ice cubes short of a full tray   : o  "   

[  Abominable  Snowman  ]   " A Reindeer Pooped on my Head "   : (   

[  Elf  ]   "  See ?  I told you they could fly  ( ! ) "   

                               THE  MAGIC  IN  THE TOYS  
                             IS FROM THE GIRLS AND BOYS ...   

59.99 seconds more  

                                       Just one minute mor'    
                                       Just one minute mor'    
                                       Just one minute ...   
                                       mor'   

   You don't wanna take it easy  -  You never wanna take it slow  
   Ya only wanna see me comin'   -  but never wanna see me go  
                         Sometime' , I wanna take it slow  
                                     Don't cha know ?  

   It's all I need  -  but not all I want  
   Just a little taste  -  until I give you all I got, yeah  
   Feel the flow  -  Feel the need   
                How long it gonna take  
                    ' til you believe ?  

                                        Just one minute mor'   
                                        Just one minute mor'   
                                        Just one minute  

Break  

    
                                        Just one minute mor'   
                                        Just one minute mor'   
                                        Just one minute mor' , more or less 
                                        Just one minute  

                                        " Hey ... Wh'  don't cha ... take off that dress ? "   

   Don't worry  ' bout the wait  -  just don't be late  /  " late "   
                             " I like it like that "   

                                       Just one minute mor'   
                                       Just one minute mor'   
                                       Just one minute 
                                       mor'   

Love Stank or Stanky Love ?   

The single, lonely pubic hair 
between my teeth 
reminds me of you  

I keep it there 
to show I care 
and then it grew  

                        I use your underwear 
                        to slick down my hair 
                        to remind me of you  

                        I can still feel your scent ; 
                        it won't relent  -  
                        Not quite  " Heaven Sent "   -  
                        but it sticks like glue  

You're NO  " Hygienic Honey "  -  
Yes, my  " Rotting Runny Bunny "  
Even when you may smell  " funny "  -  
I still  Love  You Blue  

                        Oh, you might be slightly Oozy, 
                        even in a large Jacuzzi  ( ! )  
                        I feel the bubbles sting my eyes 
                        with each  " Diseased Surprise "  
                        But in the pain, there surely lies 
                        a  Love  So True  

So, if you're somewhat willin' , 
a shot of  Penicillin  
is the least that I can do  

We'll frolic through  the Forest  ;  
' though, the Creatures may deplore us  -  
" Olfactory Furry Rivals "  -  
The chance of Our Survivals  
coincide with this mess 
and the stains upon your dress  

                        But when all is said and done, 
                        we should call a truce :  
                        Honey...  Please...  
                        Dooooooouche...ccch...sssssssssssh  

The Coronavirus Blues  musical bandwagon song  

        We're all dazed  
But Not Confused  
We hear the stories  
We watch the News  
       Just how much more 
is there to lose 
from these  
             Coronavirus Blues ?  

Already missin'  normal 
or what  " Normal "  used to be  
I can feel the  
             Covid-19  
a-callin'  me  

Whoever thought we'd need to see, to be ourselves, 
toilet paper sittin'  back along the shelves ?  

        We got the  
             Coronavirus Blues  

Can't hardly stand 
to turn on the News  
       Just how much more 
is there to lose 
from these  
             Coronavirus Blues ?  

Break  

    Now, when The Cure comes 
and all is  " Said and Done "  
What will they hear you say  
' bout how you treated ev'ryone  
       ( and each and ev-er-y day ) ?  

I hope they say :  

        We had the  
             Coronavirus Blues   
        We paid our  
             " Coronavirus Dues "  -  

Stayed in at night  
Tried not to fight  
Looked for the Light  
Knew wrong from Right  

              and kept The Future In Sight ...   

       !!!!!!!  WITH ALL OUR MIGHT  !!!!!!!   

Well, Screw those  
             Coronavirus Blues  

I'm gonna run in the Sun ...   
of course, I'll stay clear of ev'ryone  
I'm gonna make my own  FUN  -  
Wash my hands with a, a Honey Bun  

You may not see me smile  
' cause I'll be wearin'  a mask  ( ! )  
But I won't worry as much 
' cause I'll have my  " Trusty Flask "     : )   

So you can take your  
             Covid-19  

and Flush it Down  
as One Bad Dream  

       Just Hope You'll   ALL  
                      Stay Safe and Warm  

through this  
             Corona...virus... Storm...   

THE SPECIAL SNOW HOUSE  - 

A Snowflakie Fable   

Every Winter Morning in their Special House, 

from 3 to 9 years old, 

two brothers and two sisters, 

huddled in the cold  

The tree was bare, NO presents there, 

empty stockings hanging in the air. . .   

but they didn’t care,

no they didn’t care  

Chorus  1  :  

‘cause ev’ry Christmas Eve,

for as long as they believed, 

the strangest thing would happen 

-  even with the fire glowing  -  

inside their house on Christmas Eve,

it was always snowing  ( !! )  

Chorus  2  :

Snowing in their house on Christmas Eve 

for as long as they chose to believe 

Snowin’ inside the house . . . 

On Christmas Eve  

They’d build a snowman in the living room 

with buttons and a scarf and a snowman’s broom 

Make snow angels on the kitchen floor and

when it snowed inside just a little bit more, 

they’d have snowball fights from their bedroom doors 

and ride a slide made of ice down the dining room table 

You might think it’s a Snowflakie Fable   : )  

but . . . it . . . was . . . always . . . 

Chorus  2  

An’ here’s another Winter Magic thing 

-  nothing like Summer or Fall or Spring  -  

After every Christmas Eve,

for as long as they chose to believe,

even though the tree was bare, 

NO presents there,

with empty stockings hanging in the air 

when they’d all wake up on Christmas Day,

before the snow inside could melt away,

there’d be presents ev’rywhere :  

under the tree, in the stockings,

even on the stairs  -  

It was a  Merry Christmas  Everywhere !!!  

Chorus  1 & 2     

Elf :  “ Happy Christmas everyone ! “   

Elf too :  “  No !  Don’t be an Icicle head !  It’s  Merry  Christmas ! “   

Elf :  “  But  you can be Happy and  Merry on Christmas “   

Large Man in Red Suit :  “  That’s right !  Ho !  Ho !  Ho ! 

                              HAPPY MERRY CHRISTMAS !  “ 

. . .   Do You Believe ? . . .  

PUN POKE COW  

(  Chatter  -  " Cowboys and Cowgirls don't have SNAFUs, they have Snaffle-FUs . . . That's a Snaffle Baffle or a Baffle Snaffle, I don't know.  Here, Here's some sound wisdom :   ya know, A Pair o' Aces Ain't Hard Ta Hold, But A Pair o' Deuces Can Make Ya Cold . . . too two cold . . . That's some straight-shootin'  right thar  )   

       I've got spurs that jingle but won't jangle   
 I've got cows that rustle but won't wrangle   
       There's a prairie dog in my head  
 but I think that it is dead  
       and, last night, the campfire burnt my butt   

(  Chatter  -  " Hah-yee !  I mean, Yeehah ! "  )   

 They say there haren't enough desserts in the desert   
       but I deserted hope and fear   
 I've got a tumbleweed in my pants  
       that's why I love to dance  
 an' my horse only wears blue suede shoes   

(  Chatter  -  " That sure t'aint my horse ; you can here that one a-comin' . . . ' cause, ' cause them blue suede shoes are-a so soft, you can't hear my horse a-comin' . . . he'll sneak right up on ya "  )   

       My saddle won't talk to me no more  
 so I don't know why it is sore   
       I keep cactus in my nose  
 so my boogers don't git froze  
       an' I just found out why my special saddle won't talk to me anymore  -  It's for the same exact reason why barbed wire is my bridle   

(  Chatter  -  " I sure  'nough miss my ol'  bridle . . . I reckon my sneaky horse does too . . . that barbed wire tends to be a tad bit un-for-givin'  [ ! ] "  )   

       I forgot 'bout bustin' sod “ tooth and nail “   
 But I remember what I left beyond the trail -   
       A green and purple coyote  
 but it may 'ave been peyote  
       and that explains the “ rattler “ on my head   
 Makes it kinda hard ta go ta bed   

( Chatter  -  " But it, it, it was a baby, a baby rattler . . . I could tell by the little plastic rattle it was a-carryin'  with 'im . . . Shucks . . . that's a Chuck-a-ler . . . Tarnation Creation "  )   

       Well . . . the . . . sun . . . set . . . lassoes me and you   
 Well, now . . . I . . . think I'll be on my way  'cause it's a special day . . .   

(  Chatter  -  " I just found out, I won tickets for one o' them thar vacations on a Lux-ur-y Li-ner . . . goin'  ta some strange, exotic tropical paradise . . .  It's called . . . Wake Island "  )   

       So . . . keep . . . yer . . . powder clean 'n' dry   
 and only spit in your own eye  
       and I'll see you when the cot -'n'- tails . . . turn gold   

(  Chatter  -  " Meantime . . . can't hardly wait  ' til I mosey on over ta . . . Wake Island "  )  

Break

(  Chatter  -  " Hey . . . Hold up Over Yonder . . . Hoopin'  and-a Hoolerin' . . . Can't ya see I'm a Hoorayin'  over here . . . Oughta give you a Wallopin' . . . Ya Wanderin', Western, Whimperin', Wild-Eyed, Willow-Whompin', Wildernest beasts "  )  

                     Yes, I'll see you when the cot -'n' - tails . . . turn gold

Sis Times Sister Times

                        Who . . . helped look after you 

             when all you knew was just how to drool ? 

                   Who . . . grabbed you those treats 

               when you were just too small to reach ? 

                  The same ones that learned to Love 

                           from Momma and Daddy 

                            and The Heavens Above 

        I said, now, Who . . . always pulled cha through 

            when the streets left ya black and blue ? 

                 An’ now, Who . . . stuck up for you 

         when The World didn’t know what was true ? 

           The same young girls that learned to Love 

                        from Momma and Daddy 

                         and The Heavens Above 

                      Sisters, talkin’  ‘ bout Sisters 

              The Best thing about a Brother’s Love 

                   is a Sister Full o’ Brotherly Love 

                   Who . . . taught ya how to dress 

         When you were even more of a Sloppy Mess ? 

                     Who . . . used ta give ya rides 

               when you weren’t old enough to drive ? 

                             Same young women 

                              who Paved the way 

                              to send young men 

                              on their Proper way 

                        Sisters, talkin’  ‘ bout Sisters 

                The Best thing about a Brother’s Love 

                    is a Sister Full o’ Brotherly Love 

                 The same ones that learned to Love 

                        from Momma and Daddy 

                         and The Heavens Above 

                      Sisters, talkin’  ‘ bout Sisters 

               The Best thing about a Brother’s Love 

                   is a Sister Full o’ Brotherly Love 

               The Best thing about a Brother’s Love 

                                      is a Sister 

                                  I said, a Sister 

                                        full of

                                      Brotherly 

                                          Love

WOMAN ON DA MOON

They say there’s a Man in the Moon, 

but I wanna go an’ see 

if there’s a Woman on the Moon 

for me 

Well, they say there’s a Man in the Moon 

I just gotta go an’ see 

if there’s a Woman on the Moon 

for me . . . just like I want it to be 

Break

We’ll have Fun in da Sun 

When nighttime falls, whatever may come 

with the Woman on the Moon 

and me 

Yes, we’ll have Fun in da Sun 

When the nighttime falls, whatever may come 

with the Woman on the Moon 

and me . . . just like it oughta be 

Break

Woman on da Moon 

Woman on da Moon 

A Woman on da Moon 

for me 

Woman on da Moon 

Woman on da Moon 

Said, a Woman on da Moon 

and me 

Woman on da Moon 

When the nighttime falls, it’s never too soon 

for the Woman on the Moon 

and me . . . just like it oughta be . . . 

she gonna set us free . . . 

the Woman on the Moon . . . and me

creature CHRISTMAS Town 

Where do the animals go 

in the wintertime when it gets so cold ? 

Why do the birds still sing 

when there’s a blanket o’ snow 

and you can’t see anything ? 

Well, I tripped and fell 

an’ got my head stuck in a hole, 

then dropped my jaw when I saw 

Chorus :

                Underground, 

where there’s no one else around, 

there’s a whole little 

creature CHRISTMAS Town 

Verse 2 : 

I saw squirrels and bunnies 

but they looked kinda funny, 

dressed as elves, puttin’ presents on shelves 

There were mice and bees layin’ tinsel on a tree 

an’ bulbs on beetles pickin’ up pine needles 

Then a mole skied by 

and four possums caught my eye 

They were in a toboggan 

I thought about that often 

Chorus

Break

Then all of a sudden, amongst the twinkling lights, 

somethin’ big, white and red came into sight : 

Boots and a belt and warm-hearted paws  - 

It was a big fluffy bear dressed as Santie Claus 

Chorus

Repeat beginning Verse and Chorus and Verse 2

You ever hear fish in a barrel sing a Christmas carol 

or heard a porcupine practicin’ Auld Lang Syne ? 

There’s an old hedgehog servin’ eggnog 

Grasshoppers by a lake makin’ fruitcakes 

Hey, look at that  -  an armadillo ice skatin’ 

It’s a yuletide no hibernation nation 

Crawly Holly, Furry Jolly 

Chorus  ( twice )

There’s a whole little 

creature CHRISTMAS Town

Yule Not Stop Christmas

 Verse 1 : 

       From Krampus to Scrooge and The Mean Green Grinch, 

         Who all thought endin’ the holiday season would be a cinch, 

          to the cheerless an’ stingy an’ those beyond  belief 

          who’d  rather see a plain door than an ornamental wreath 

          Even Old Man Winter can’t keep the carolers from minglin’ 

          or Jack Frost nose nippin’ keep the jingle bells from jinglin’ 

          No matter how thick or slick the ice may get 

          jolly Saint Nick is just too quick . . . that’s why 

Chorus A : 

          You can’t stop Christmas, 

           Christmas Eve or Christmas morn 

           You can’t stop Christmas noon or night 

           since the day Noel or you were born,

           Oh, oh, oh . . . Ho, ho, ho,

           Let it snow 

Chorus B : 

            There’ll always be Christmas  Magic 

             found  in the top of Frosty’s hat 

             and Rudolph will always light the way 

             to show Santa Claus just where you’re at . . . that’s why 

Chorus A  /  Verse 1  /  Chorus A  /  Chorus B 

Chorus C : 

              If you don’t see snowflakes fallin’ 

              or all your wishes don’t come true, 

              someplace in this wonderful winter world 

              there’s a snowflake fallin’ just for you . . . 

Chorus A 

Break : 

              When your Christmas list is all amiss 

               or your stocking looks like an abyss, 

               you still can’t stop Christmas 

               When the only thing stirrin’ is a mouse 

                or there ain’t no gingerbread in your house 

                you still can’t stop Christmas 

                 No, you can’t stop Christmas 

                 You can’t stop Christmas 

                 You just can’t stop Christmas 

                 It’s an avalanche of cheerful circumstance ‘cause you 

Chorus A

                 . . . since the day Noel or you 

                 and maybe The Whos 

                 or Mr. Magoo 

                 Where’s my other snowshoe ? 

                  Hey  -  Dig that igloo 

                  Twenty-three skidoo 

                   Until the last flake of snow falls, 

                   Happy Holidays  to one and all 

                   You can’t stop Christmas . . . 

                    I hope that one horse sleigh is goin’ my way 

                    I’m dreaming of an all-inclusive Christmas 

                    I heard a North Pole rumor that Mrs. Claus works 364 days                       a year  - 

                    That’s why you cant’ stop Christmas . . . Yule Not Stop                               Christmas

                    Dunder and Blixem, look out for Cupid and Vixen

52 and a Day

Main Chorus : 

52  ‘n’ a Day an’ another one along the way 

[ Sometime ]  it  [ don’t ]  matter [ whatcha ] think or say, it’s always 

52  ‘n’ a Day an’ another one along the way 

Verse : 

Just like a deck o’ cards, the Jokers are bound to go wild 

Could be Aces & Eights or a wink an’ a smile 

It’s up and downhill, since you  [ was ]  just a child 

Ev’rything’ll change in a blink or in a while,  ‘cause it’s 

Main Chorus

Break : 

Let the world spin ‘n’  the day  ‘n’ night begin 

Let the tables turn  ‘n’  the lessons lost or learned 

Will the spirits still flow, from when  [ yer ]  here to when you go ? 

Play the hand  [ yer ]  dealt, Come What May,  ‘cause it’s . . .

Main Chorus

Don’t really matter what I think or say, they’ll be another year here anyway,  ‘cause it’s 

Chorus 2 : 

52  ‘n’ a day  ‘n ‘ another one along the way . . . 

Come What May, it’s always 

Chorus 2

It’s all the same for you and me, Where we’re all bound to be, Because it’s 

Chorus 2

Where we’re all bound to be, The Mystery of Destiny 

Chorus 2

Oooooh, Come What May, It’s always 

Chorus 2

First it crawls and then it leaps, whether you’re awake or you’re asleep, it’s always 

52  ‘n’ a Day  ‘n’ another one along the way, it’s always 

52  ‘n’ a Day  ‘n’ another one along the way 

52  ‘n’ a Day  ‘n’ another Come What May

Sour Grapes In California 

Parody of the iconic song “ Sweet Home Alabama “ by the equally iconic band  Lynyrd Skynyrd  (  WARNING :  All lyrics, melodies, and music is theirs and any affiliated party’s sole property and should NOT be used for any monetary gains without prior legal consent )

“ Turn it down “

Little wheels just stopped turnin’
Ain’t got no home, can’t find my kin
Singin’ songs about the west southwest land
an’ I miss my brain once again ‘n’ I think it’s a sin, yes

Well, I love them ol’ Neil Young Classics  “ Southwestern Man “
And Free Bird flies just as high  “ Yes It Do “
Bitter people make me nervous
They can take their place right next to my thigh  “ Oh, me, oh, my “

Chorus 1 :
Sour Grapes In California  -
Bad for brains and bad for minds
Sour Grapes, I tried ta warn ya ;
me, I’ll stick to spiced rum ev’ry time

I liked Jerry Brown as a Gov’nor  “ New-som too “
I haven’t yet done all I can do  “ Boo hoo hoo “
Now, whoever thought that Nixon could be “ trumped “ ?
Does yer conscience bother you ?  Tell me true

Chorus 2 :
Sour Grapes In California  -
Bad for brains and bad for minds
Sour Grapes, I tried ta warn ya ;
I’ll take Captain Pepper /  Dr. Morgan ev’ry time  “ There I go . . . California “

Break :
Aaah, Aaah, Aaah, Sour Grapes, go  [ 3 x’s ]
Aaah, Aaah, Aaah, Sour Grapes

Now, too much wine can make ya throw up,
if ya raise more glasses than just a few
There’s been times when I’ve woke up
and felt like my head was split in two  “ Now, how ‘bout you ? “

Chorus 3 :
Sour Grapes In California  -
Bad for brains and bad for minds
Sour Grapes, I tried ta warn ya  “ Lordy “
That’s why I choose spiced rum each ‘n’ ev’ry time

Chorus 4 :
Sour Grapes In California  “ Please love our fruits and nuts “  -
Bad for brains and bad for minds  “ especially mine  ( !! ) “
Sour Grapes, I tried ta warn ya,
Sweet as Alabama wine . . .

“ Ah, I’m sure that tastes just fine “

“ Napa Valley’s got the answer . . . an’ the Sonoma County line “

Flicker  of  Halloween

        Chorus :

The Pumpkin Man has arms of vines,
a stem for a hat and a seedy mind
His legs and body are made o’ vines too
and his candle flickers when he yells  “ Boo ! “

In the pumpkin patch, after midnight,
when the wind is low an’ when the fog’s  just right,
he closes his mouth  ‘n’  squints his eyes
and  hides his nose to keep the light inside
Then, in between the creaking of the trees,
after he hears the shaking  of  your knees,
he’ll  slither  on the ground  ‘ n ‘  sneak up on you,
then you’ll  see his candle flicker when he yells  “ Boo ! “

        Chorus

So . . . if . . . you’re . . .
in a pumpkin patch  ‘ n ‘  somethin’  doesn’t feel right,
make sure that it’s not . . . after midnight
‘cause, from the foggy ground, he’ll sneak up on you,
then you’ll  see his candle flicker when he yells  “ Boo ! “

Oh . . .

        Chorus

Yes, his candle flickers when he yells  “ Boooo ! “  Ooooh, Eeeee, Ooooooh  “ It’s true  -  I don’t know if he’s mean or sneaky, but I do know, he seems awful  creepy, just like . . . “

FOR MOST OF YOU

How to get off  The Naughty List
can be a difficult thing
Some Children stay on The Naughty List
until the Spring
and, all that time, no Christmas present,
not a single thing

If  You try not to pout or cry
You can be on The Nice List too,
Just listen to Mon
and listen to Dad,
You’ll be glad,
I know it’s true . . . well . . .
For Most of You

I was once on The Naughty List
years ago  -
I wouldn’t clean my room or go to bed
when I was told
But when I tried not to pout and cry,
then I was on The Nice List too  -
I listened to Mom
and listened to Dad
and You’ll be glad
if  You know that’s true . . . well . . .
For Most of You

Who knows if  you’ve been naughty or nice ?
Most of You   ( :

Wherever That Comes From

Those who only know . . . games and names
are those who only see . . . cold and old
Yet, there’s still fire in my veins
There still power in my soul
an’ Wherever That Comes From
Still Feels Young

Those who only know . . . black and white
are those who only see . . . shades of gray

Blinded by their lack of sight
Wanderin’ minds that never learned the way
There’s wisdom to be found
even for those who may be lost
Nowhere to run from one sun
Life and Death’s the only cost

But for now,
There’s still fire in my soul
There’s still power in my veins
an’ Wherever That Comes From
Still Feels Young
Still Feels Young
Still Feels

Snow on the roof,
but room for flames in my heart
The years haven’t torn my soul
completely apart

It Still Feels Young
It Still Feels Young
Wherever That Comes From
Still Feels Young . . .
Wherever That Comes From

HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN

HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN
                Time to laugh and get ready to scream
HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN
Not a toothache nightmare, just a candy dream
HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN
                          Treat or trick or trick or treat
where all of the other little monsters meet
     an' you don't even hafta smell their feet
HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN
                                           Trick or treat or treat or trick
        Hear the werewolf sing and see the candle flick
                        from the Jack-o-lantern's dancing wick
Watch out for the clock with the tock without a tick
                         Treat or trick or trick or treat
The sidewalk is safe, beware on the street
                               Trick or treat or treat or trick
When your bag is full, you can take your pick
HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN
It's time to laugh and get ready to scream
HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN

"  I once saw a vampire shopping at a grocery store and a werewolf walking a cat on a leash.  I've seen a mummy come out of a men's room with a strand of toilet paper stuck to his foot.  I watched Frankenstein bodysurf during a full moon as The Creature from The Black Lagoon strolled by carrying a goldfish bowl with two fish in it he named Flipper and Floppy.  There was also a witch flying about, wearin' a cowboy hat an' cowboy boots and she had a saddle on her broom while she sat twirling a rope over her head . . . I'm gonna dress as a farmer this year, so I can trick or treat using a wheelbarrow . . . I, I think I just heard a bunch o' skeletons playin' Yahtzee . . . I hope they're having fun  "

HELLO  HALLOW  HAPPYWEEN
It's time to laugh and get ready to scream
       HAP-PY HAL-LO-WEEN

“  I think that ghost has a boo boo  ”

CLINT YOUNG never kneel

The Old Grey Man is creepin' in,
hopin' I'll call 'im my last friend
My weary bones would creak again,
if I gave in to the end

I'll widen my eyes an' clench my fists,
gather my strength to resist
No matter how much he insists,
I won't give in to the end

                    Well, our . . . time . . .
                    will always come,
                    but I'll walk on,
                    even . . . when I can't run
                    We'll still have our nights
                    an' our . . . day in the sun
                    if we don't give in to the end,
                    if we don't give in . . . to . . . the end

                                             The Old Grey Man is creepin' in,
                                             but I'll never call 'im my last friend
                                             My heart an' bones may ache again,
                                             but I won't give in to the end

                                             We'll widen our eyes an' clench our fists,
                                             gather our strength to resist
                                             No matter how many ways he persists,
                                             don't cha give in to the end
                                             Don't give in to the end
                                             Don't give in . . . to . . . the end

                    Well, our . . . time . . .
                    will always come,
                    so don't cha give in to the end
                    Don't cha give in to the end
                    Don't cha give in to the end
                    Don't cha give in . . . to . . . the end

     When the Old Grey Man comes creepin' in,
     don't give in to the end
     When the Old Grey Man comes creepin' in,
     don't cha give in to the end
     Hey, don't give in to the end, yeah
     Don't give in to the end
     Don't give in to the end
     Don't give in to the end, well

     [ That Old Grey Man, always 'round the bend,
       so don't cha give in to The End ]